I have spent my home care career fitting in.  This is not a bad thing. I have been able to spend significant time with one person, helping them to develop whatever skills we could in the time we had.  This is in contrast to the feeling I have working in the Maker Space where I feel I belong. 

Now, maybe the others in the space do not feel the same way about me but that is actually not the point. I feel that I belong. It is the kind of space that allows me to expand in ways that working in a family setting does not.  And that is good.  It’s the difference between the needs of one and the needs of many for one thing.  And with my hummingbird mind, that suits.  

I was able to apply the hummer to individuals by calling on the varieties of interests I had been accumulating.  Different disciplines that all converge on resolving the system of questions any individual is.  In the Maker Space the variety is both from me as well as from the community.  So, I get feedback.  

Some of the feedback works to either expand or ground what I already know.  That expansion is usually a back and forth where each one is putting in a new piece of the idea.  The grounding part is the idea finding a home where it solves a problem, answers a question or suggests an insight. 

I spent some time in foster care so fitting in is not a huge leap. It has, in fact, proven to be a super power given my career.  Belonging is another issue.  And this week has been a deep reveal of what it means to belong.   I have been angry, frustrated, testy (according to one), and whiny.  But through it all I have also been allowed to have all of those feelings and act them out.  Then get comforted and commiserated with and listened to.   And all of that within the ordinary flow of the day, or the week.  

In the last couple of days I have recognized that some of the conflict has been between trying to fit in and feeling that I belong.  It’s an interesting place to be in, a new station on the path.